This blog is to keep track of my writing (from Oct. '14 onward), saving tips and tricks I find, little rants or raves, and so on. If you don't like it, kindly leave. I am a fangirl and reviewer, so do tend to post on that note as well.
Ah, college. After two years of Hellish life and my mom getting me back into the groove of attending (summer courses are just a handful, honestly), I finally started college (instead of just summer courses.)
During my first orientation (not the first day one, because I missed that) I was on-time, but late compared to the others. I felt awkward, as usual, but I laughed inwardly because the only seat left was by a girl I knew a bit from my home town (and two years younger). I tried to stay by her and when we left the main room I happened to start talking to someone else. Come to find out, she is older, but also it's funny how I naturally gravitate towards older people.
And after our orientation with the library, I stayed and chatted with the director (such a lovely woman) for nearly 40 minutes. Scared my mom, since she drove me and I felt rude using my phone to tell her what was up. But we discussed life and found our lives to have very similar situations going on. I most definitely enjoyed her company and hope I can be around her more. Plus, the library is a place I like a lot. I always feel warm and welcome there.
Unfortunately I had to go ahead and do only online courses this semester, but I found it easier on my parents, so I had to only convince my mom to let me to ease their burdens. I feel she's way more excited for my college career than I am. I've constantly been around adults and the medical field due to my life with JDM, so I'm comfy around adults and the adult atmosphere. Plus, I had to learn to manage my time and study properly throughout high school due to homebound courses and years. It was a struggle, and I'm sure I was a pain in the ass to everyone who worked at my school, but I made it through. That was the biggest accomplishment. Although, let me note that the downside to homebound life and the struggles some gave me.... I nearly gave up on my education right then and there because some teachers made my life Hell. I can't name names, but let me tell you... I've mentioned to some people outside that school and they said the behavior some of those teachers had was downright wrong.
Moving on.
The courses I have are as follows: Social Problems (Sociology), Computer Applications, Psychology, and the Orientation stuff.
Sociology has been a learning process. I took Intro into Sociology in the summer and had to read the whole book in a month, compared to now. And I'm having to write application papers (which I find much more entertaining and knowledgeable than doing assignments like in high school. Through the app papers, you apply what you've learned to an outside situation that relates to whatever chapter you're on. It's fun. A bit difficult for me at first but I love the overall idea.
Computer Apps is a pain, let me tell you. Having to have two sites to maintain my schedule isn't difficult, just a pain in my ass, since I forget super easily now and not checking that other site for work is a task for me. The point of the class is to learn about computer and their programming and how to work stuff on there. Easy-peasy, sure. But trying to pair things that aren't even in your book is hard AF. I was so angry that I had words on there I didn't know because I didn't have them in my eBook. I have yet to check my actual book. I may need to slap myself for not attending to my actual book at first, even though they say using your eBook is the same. We'll see.
And Psych starts in September. I'm hyped for this class, as it's my main field of study. I constantly use what psych skills I have and sometimes have to remind myself I can't evaluate every person I meet. It's such a bad habit of mine, and I probably need to stop, but it's like a damn reaction to meeting people. I'm like a robot, assessing you in the first minute or so.
Anyways, the main point was to document my first few weeks. Plus, copy and paste my "Culture Shock" blog post. I read everyone else's and my conclusion: girls write more than boys, we express more, and we follow rules better. No offense, boys. It's what I saw after reading all the blogs.
Culture Shock.
I've spent a good deal of my middle
school and high school career homebound, which meant every time I tried
to return to school, I felt a very evident culture shock. It was
frightening and ultimately helped me adapt once I reached college age.
Now, two years past high school and just starting my college career, I definitely feel very awkward around other students. Stage 1: The Honeymoon. I didn't really experience this, because I
see college as another stepping stone in life and take it seriously. I
feel way too... blah about the beginning, mainly because I
dived head in with the summer courses (that were crammed) and I've
already experienced the college-like environment in high school. That's
due to the crazy hours, the studying habits I had to learn, and being
more mature. That prepared me and so the honeymoon phase hasn't seemed
to appear in my life -- if it ever will. Stage 2: Initial Culture Shock. I'm currently just taking online
courses, with Orientation as my main source of being woven into the
college life. I feel extremely odd around kids my age - always have. I
think I do feel a bit of this phase, as I'm awkward, though I try to be
friendly, and I don't know what people my age like or do. I've been so
absorbed in my writing, international things (and pen pals, that
American culture still shocks me (ironically) and I don't really know
exactly what to do or say. Plus I find a lot of things college kids do
as weird - parties, not caring too much, being super social all the
time. I'm so used to staying focused on my studies and interacting with
teachers more-so, that I know this is a challenge I have to face sooner
or later.
Stage 3: Recovery and Adjustment. I felt very overwhelmed during
the summer, because I didn't know how fast-paced the classes were, so I
was very down on myself if I'd miss questions (and when I made a 70 on
an exam). But now with this semester starting, I feel a lot better and
know I can do things, but if I fail or don't do my best, I can try
harder. It's not the end of the world. Stage 4: Isolation. I think this relates to Stage 2 a lot. Because I am isolated
in a physical sense, but I can always do more to be social amongst my
peers. Though I feel like people would be all, "Why is she trying so
hard?" Because when I do take initiative and try to be social, I may
talk too much, or unconsciously state facts, or bring up weird things
like my experience with Korean culture. So, I feel very out-of-touch
with my generation at points, and my values also. I fit better with
teachers and staff than I do my peers. And that keeps me in an isolated
bubble, at most. I definitely think this is an internal thing and a lot
of kids face this at some point, but it's a tad bit hard to just push it
away and not care how you present yourself to others.
Stage 5: Assimilation and Adaption. I do accept my life
as it is, but I don't feel integrated, so I haven't broached this stage
yet. I may have an idea of what it will be like, but I haven't truly
been there yet. I hope I reach this stage and quit fearing everything
that has to do with college life. I may be mature in the real world, but
I'm still lacking in the college world, because for one, I fear the
people, the adaptations I may have to take, and how things have changed.
But I go into this with open arms because I want to feel more at ease
in college.
I know for a fact I have faced culture shock head on (more than once)
and I'm hoping that I'll improve with ease. Social anxiety has always
been a problem for me and only this year have I really faced it and felt
the world around me without the fear of others. Nearly 20 years of
untreated social anxiety has an effect on you, so it's hard to adapt to a
culture of accepting and friendly people.
Ah, college. After two years of Hellish life and my mom getting me back into the groove of attending (summer courses are just a handful, honestly), I finally started college (instead of just summer courses.)
During my first orientation (not the first day one, because I missed that) I was on-time, but late compared to the others. I felt awkward, as usual, but I laughed inwardly because the only seat left was by a girl I knew a bit from my home town (and two years younger). I tried to stay by her and when we left the main room I happened to start talking to someone else. Come to find out, she is older, but also it's funny how I naturally gravitate towards older people.
And after our orientation with the library, I stayed and chatted with the director (such a lovely woman) for nearly 40 minutes. Scared my mom, since she drove me and I felt rude using my phone to tell her what was up. But we discussed life and found our lives to have very similar situations going on. I most definitely enjoyed her company and hope I can be around her more. Plus, the library is a place I like a lot. I always feel warm and welcome there.
Unfortunately I had to go ahead and do only online courses this semester, but I found it easier on my parents, so I had to only convince my mom to let me to ease their burdens. I feel she's way more excited for my college career than I am. I've constantly been around adults and the medical field due to my life with JDM, so I'm comfy around adults and the adult atmosphere. Plus, I had to learn to manage my time and study properly throughout high school due to homebound courses and years. It was a struggle, and I'm sure I was a pain in the ass to everyone who worked at my school, but I made it through. That was the biggest accomplishment. Although, let me note that the downside to homebound life and the struggles some gave me.... I nearly gave up on my education right then and there because some teachers made my life Hell. I can't name names, but let me tell you... I've mentioned to some people outside that school and they said the behavior some of those teachers had was downright wrong.
Moving on.
The courses I have are as follows: Social Problems (Sociology), Computer Applications, Psychology, and the Orientation stuff.
Sociology has been a learning process. I took Intro into Sociology in the summer and had to read the whole book in a month, compared to now. And I'm having to write application papers (which I find much more entertaining and knowledgeable than doing assignments like in high school. Through the app papers, you apply what you've learned to an outside situation that relates to whatever chapter you're on. It's fun. A bit difficult for me at first but I love the overall idea.
Computer Apps is a pain, let me tell you. Having to have two sites to maintain my schedule isn't difficult, just a pain in my ass, since I forget super easily now and not checking that other site for work is a task for me. The point of the class is to learn about computer and their programming and how to work stuff on there. Easy-peasy, sure. But trying to pair things that aren't even in your book is hard AF. I was so angry that I had words on there I didn't know because I didn't have them in my eBook. I have yet to check my actual book. I may need to slap myself for not attending to my actual book at first, even though they say using your eBook is the same. We'll see.
And Psych starts in September. I'm hyped for this class, as it's my main field of study. I constantly use what psych skills I have and sometimes have to remind myself I can't evaluate every person I meet. It's such a bad habit of mine, and I probably need to stop, but it's like a damn reaction to meeting people. I'm like a robot, assessing you in the first minute or so.
Anyways, the main point was to document my first few weeks. Plus, copy and paste my "Culture Shock" blog post. I read everyone else's and my conclusion: girls write more than boys, we express more, and we follow rules better. No offense, boys. It's what I saw after reading all the blogs.
Culture Shock.
I've spent a good deal of my middle
school and high school career homebound, which meant every time I tried
to return to school, I felt a very evident culture shock. It was
frightening and ultimately helped me adapt once I reached college age.
Now, two years past high school and just starting my college career, I definitely feel very awkward around other students. Stage 1: The Honeymoon. I didn't really experience this, because I
see college as another stepping stone in life and take it seriously. I
feel way too... blah about the beginning, mainly because I
dived head in with the summer courses (that were crammed) and I've
already experienced the college-like environment in high school. That's
due to the crazy hours, the studying habits I had to learn, and being
more mature. That prepared me and so the honeymoon phase hasn't seemed
to appear in my life -- if it ever will. Stage 2: Initial Culture Shock. I'm currently just taking online
courses, with Orientation as my main source of being woven into the
college life. I feel extremely odd around kids my age - always have. I
think I do feel a bit of this phase, as I'm awkward, though I try to be
friendly, and I don't know what people my age like or do. I've been so
absorbed in my writing, international things (and pen pals, that
American culture still shocks me (ironically) and I don't really know
exactly what to do or say. Plus I find a lot of things college kids do
as weird - parties, not caring too much, being super social all the
time. I'm so used to staying focused on my studies and interacting with
teachers more-so, that I know this is a challenge I have to face sooner
or later.
Stage 3: Recovery and Adjustment. I felt very overwhelmed during
the summer, because I didn't know how fast-paced the classes were, so I
was very down on myself if I'd miss questions (and when I made a 70 on
an exam). But now with this semester starting, I feel a lot better and
know I can do things, but if I fail or don't do my best, I can try
harder. It's not the end of the world. Stage 4: Isolation. I think this relates to Stage 2 a lot. Because I am isolated
in a physical sense, but I can always do more to be social amongst my
peers. Though I feel like people would be all, "Why is she trying so
hard?" Because when I do take initiative and try to be social, I may
talk too much, or unconsciously state facts, or bring up weird things
like my experience with Korean culture. So, I feel very out-of-touch
with my generation at points, and my values also. I fit better with
teachers and staff than I do my peers. And that keeps me in an isolated
bubble, at most. I definitely think this is an internal thing and a lot
of kids face this at some point, but it's a tad bit hard to just push it
away and not care how you present yourself to others.
Stage 5: Assimilation and Adaption. I do accept my life
as it is, but I don't feel integrated, so I haven't broached this stage
yet. I may have an idea of what it will be like, but I haven't truly
been there yet. I hope I reach this stage and quit fearing everything
that has to do with college life. I may be mature in the real world, but
I'm still lacking in the college world, because for one, I fear the
people, the adaptations I may have to take, and how things have changed.
But I go into this with open arms because I want to feel more at ease
in college.
I know for a fact I have faced culture shock head on (more than once)
and I'm hoping that I'll improve with ease. Social anxiety has always
been a problem for me and only this year have I really faced it and felt
the world around me without the fear of others. Nearly 20 years of
untreated social anxiety has an effect on you, so it's hard to adapt to a
culture of accepting and friendly people.
Name: Zoe Patterson
Known as: Cat Lady - jk! KissDromeda, KissDromedaGirl, Juliane (rp), Hyunchul 현철(rp), Sohee/소희.
Age: Nearly two decades old!
Lives at: Tumblr, AFF, blogspot, Twitter, and currently Evexia.
Country: USA
Favorite Colors: Pastels, Lilac, lavender, any shade of purple basically, white, silver, black, any shade of gray (however, Christian Grey isn't one), clear, any shade of blue, teal, coral, salmon.
Language: English (native), Korean (good enough), Spanish (good enough), intros in Italian, Japanese, Greek, and tagalog.
Hobbies: Writing (ofc), browsing the web, taking care of my cats, drawing, thinking up ideas, playing either Sims or Star Wars, reading, reviewing, dancing, singing, composing.
Favorite Quote: "If you believe in yourself, you're unstoppable."
Likes:
♥ Cats [this is a cat basecode so ofc this is here]
♥ Anything artistic
♥ Korean stuff, and many more cultures, too. I wanted to be an Egyptologist.
♥ Rapping and dancing; composing or choreographing
♥ Tumblr, Twitter, ifunny, etc.
Dislikes:
✖ Haters and fakers
✖ anxiety and depression [suffering from both]
✖ dealing with a lot of stress
Exchange Links
The current linked as "Zahra, Tsabbita, and DianeeyA' are the basecoders for this blog, so they get the creds! The rest are ones I like, my friends, and so on.
Random things since this is already here from the basecode. Check it out, and if it's empty, head on over to my Tumblr tags and browse around. eue Scroll down to the Others section!
I found myself in Wonderland, got back on my feet again - Alice by Avril Lavigne
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